Daily Life Lessons from Rabbi Heschel

Year 3 Day 259

“In order to be a master, one must learn how to be an apprentice. Reverence for the old, dialogue between generations, is as important to the dignity of the young as it is for the well-being of the old. We deprive ourselves by disparaging the old.” (Insecurity of Freedom pg. 84)

“Reverence” comes from the Latin meaning “to stand in awe of” and “dignity” comes from the Latin meaning “worthy”. “Dialogue” comes from the Greek meaning “through word”, deprive comes from the Latin meaning “away completely”, and “disparage” comes from the Latin meaning” unequal rank”. I look the words up to better understand how, why, and the different ways Rabbi Heschel “dialogues” with us.

Reading the last two sentences above as “to stand in awe of the old, (relating) through words between generations, is as important to the worthy of the young as it is to the well-being of the old. We take away completely from ourselves by making the old unequal to us” is the way I am hearing Rabbi Heschel this morning. In the cultures that did not survive antiquity such as Assyrian, Greek, Egyptian, Roman, etc one of the things they had in common was  their irreverence for the old, their disparagement of the old, etc. Once one had ceased being able to ‘work’, your value was “disparaged” etc. This trend has continued up to today! The treatment of the “old” varies depending on the times, it has an ebb and flow, yet very few societies have had the “reverence for the old” that Japanese Culture is famous for, very few societies believe that regular “dialogue between generations” will lead to better wisdom and outcomes for the next generation. Very few cultures today realize that these will lead to the younger generation being more worthy to assume the mantle of leadership and will, in reality, change the trajectory of how we live. Very few cultures ‘know in their bones’ that they take away from themselves when they see the old as less worthy, of lesser rank than themselves.

Yet, for the millennia, we have been unable to sustain a way of living that has “reverence for the old” that promotes “dialogue between generations”. The old see the younger generation as trying to ‘usurp their power’, ‘take their place’, ‘sweep out their accomplishments’, etc. The young see the older generation as ‘standing in their way’, ‘trying to stop progress’, ‘not wanting to let go’, etc. Without coming together “through words” we will continue to defeat ourselves as a society, continue to make the same errors our ancestors made, deny the “unalienable” rights to another individual, group, race, religion, etc. We need to learn from our history, we need to see and emulate the cultures that have found the ‘sweet spot’ between doing the same things as the previous generation in exactly the same way, “make us great again” and jettisoning everything that has gone before us for a new way of being. Returning to a “slave” environment, a way of being that makes women second-class citizens agains is not a good idea-full stop. Continuing to engage in “identity” politics and deny the dignity and humanity of another group, as has happened to Jews throughout the modern era and to many other ethnic groups is also not the right way-full stop. We need to find the middle, respecting the individual needs of people and finding the best way for humanity to grow into “being human” which is the focal point of all of Rabbi Heschel’s teachings, I believe.

“Reverence for the old…dignity of the young” is found in most religious cultures as we can witness from the awe afforded our teachers, our clergy who have learned not just the religious doctrines but also which ones fit where and when, which ones have to be re-interpreted, which ones were mislabeled doctrines when they were examples of what not to do! In the Torah, it is mentioned 36 times to care for the needy, the poor, the stranger, etc. We are told to “honor” our elders, the judges were people who had the wisdom of age and experience. Rather than disparage the old, as we have seen throughout the history of this nation and others, we need to take a page from antiquity and not sit in the seat of our elders, not make them of unequal worthiness to us, no longer believe we have to write them out of the history of the company, country, institution, family we have taken the reins of.

When we have “dialogue between generations” people grow exponentially because the older generation is not engaged in being right, rather we are engaged in helping the younger generation not fall into the same traps as we did. We are the best cheerleaders and advisors for the young because we know ‘where the bodies are buried’, what the pitfalls are, how one’s ego gets in the way of what is the next right thing to do, etc. When we have these dialogues, the young are helping the older generation be fruitful and alive, engaged and aware of our dignity and our worth. When we “stand in awe” of the older generation, the older generation “stands in awe” of us as well. Both generations come together to admire the works of the previous one and the path of the current one. It is a coming together of ideas, of human beings, a blueprint for harmony and co-existence that can be used intra-generationally as well. Learning to not “disparage the old” gives us the understanding and necessity to not “disparage” anyone. It is time for us to realize that we all need to get along and what better path to learn this than inter-generationally!

I understand this teaching very well from both sides of the coin. I did always have “reverence for the old” and engaged my elders in “dialogue” because I knew how much I had/have to learn. I also knew that “there is nothing new under the sun” so the cons I wanted to run had been done before so I should learn what not to do. Sometimes it helped and sometimes it didn’t:)! In my recovery, I picked a sponsor that had more time and more experience in being in recovery than me so I could learn and grow. In my career, I became a student of Rabbis who were more experienced, more learned, than I and to this day use them as sounding boards and measuring sticks. I am experiencing being sidelined by people because not many people seek my advice nor engage in dialogue with me. I know they have reverence for my accomplishments and it is lonely not to be engaging in the inter-generational dialogue that I so enjoyed and benefited from with my elders and still do. I am grateful for the dialogues I have with people and the learnings we do together in this moment and I am grateful to all of you for reading and interacting with my daily blog. God Bless and stay safe, Rabbi Mark